Kylie Madden

Every morning in the Penguin Room of KECC, my teacher would strap pink and black ankle weights to my four-year-old calves. “To weigh her down,” she told my mom. “To keep her from jumping.” My mom always says they just made me stronger. 

As I got older, I experienced crippling procrastination, inattentiveness and slow processing in hyperactivity’s place. I got by in middle school by pure luck. Because I consistently took longer on tests, I was often moved to a quieter location where I could focus. I think they just didn’t care as much. High school was a different story.

The climax was sophomore year, when I couldn’t complete my research paper by the summer and received my first C. I was beaten down and mad at myself for being lazy and not working hard enough. Why couldn’t I study harder? Why was everything, even just remembering I had work to do in the first place, so difficult? It was time to see a psychologist. 

At the end of it all, my suspicions were confirmed. I was diagnosed with ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder) and GAD (generalized anxiety disorder). In some ways, this was a relief to hear. Finally, I could apply for accommodations in class and for tests like the ACT. I could have the help I had always had in middle school and preschool, but this time they would be official. Or so I thought. It turns out, my grades were considered too high and I was in too many upper level classes to be given a 504 plan. And as for the ACT, even with an official diagnosis and a doctor’s recommendation letter, they required that I had a history of accommodations at school since I was 12 years old. 

So much for that. I felt I had gone through everything for nothing. 

Then I made a decision. Just because I wasn’t getting the help I needed, didn’t mean I was helpless. I worked with friends, family and teachers to get my grades back to where I wanted them. I learned how to use organization tools, my brother even brought me a giant white board calendar that has saved me from missing many events. It took a lot of grit, but with everyone pushing me to succeed, I’ve developed habits I hope will last me a lifetime. Thanks high school for putting me through hell. Luckily, the weight just made me stronger.